Recent Divine Discussions

Sunday, July 29, 2007

The second major factor to my credit card debt

I have finally found the courage to admit another factor to my increasing credit card debt........my family.

I just got back from spending the weekend with my parents, siblings, and daughter. And I winded up spending $405 big ones. $210 of it was put on a credit card and the rest came out of my spending account. Here is the breakdown of what exactly I bought/paid for:

  • Lunch @ Panera's with sibs : $40
  • Dress for Sweet Pea for my sis' wedding (she's one of the flower girls) : $95
  • Groceries for the house : $130
  • Money to Bro for haircut : $20
  • Money to Pops : $40
  • Gas in sis' car : $25
  • Gas in pop's truck : $55
The dress was a must so I guess I can subtract from the total. Lunch @ Panera's was kinda unavoidable. I was going there to grab a an iced Chai latte and they tagged along. Iced Chai latte turned into lunch for 3. How could I say no?? :-/. We had an awesome time so I really wouldn't have changed that for anything.

So why am I paying for all this? Here is how the madness breaks down:


My mom had major abdominal surgery a month ago and can't work for another month. So she will have basically been out of work for 2 months. Pops has a medical issue that keeps him from working in his trade (irrigation) and therefore has been out of work for the past 2 months and he has basically said he ain't going back to work. Sis #1 is bout to get married and all her money is directed towards the wedding and new crib with hubby-to-be. She doesn't help out at all. Sis #2 is paying her way through college. I mean she pays for everything: tuition, books, tests, etc. So her extra money to help out the household is limited. Bro is 17 and is entering his senior year in high school. He is a star football player in our county and is being heavily sought after by dozens of colleges. He also maintains a 3.9 GPA. He has school and football to concentrate on and has no time to work. Thanks to my persistence, my parents had a very nice savings account going into all this. But due to the upcoming wedding and lack of income coming in, that account is about dried out now.

So needless to say my family needs me right now and I would be a horrible daughter and sister to not help out. Plus thats my family....I'd do anything for them.....even ruin my credit and increase my credit card debt. My finances are in my face 24/7 so I can't help but to see the impact it is having on my goals. Last week I paid for my mom and brother's phone and then paid the electricity bill. The reason I wind up putting everything on credit card is because all my money has already gone to pay bills. Everything else is in savings account that I can't touch at that moment. I used up everything in my spending account and had to resort to my credit cards.

So what do I do? I mean I'll tell you right now......if my family needs me I will drop everything and do what I can in a heartbeat. Even if I need to clear out all my savings. So is there a way to help out and still stay on track with my goals??? If so please let me know. Cuz right now, this looks to be an issue that has no solution. All this is nothing new. It's like a cycle. Couple of months everything is good then something crazy happens and it goes bad. Hopefully this won't go on for much longer.

This is why I really need to find a way to bring in some extra dough. Then I could help out using that money. I still haven't had time or the resources to try out the whole notary signing agent thing. From what my friend says, you can make some nice secondary income on that. If only I could just win the lottery. I don't even need that much...........$100,000 could pay off all my debt and I would still have a lot left over to give to my parents ($25K).

*sigh*


8 comments:

SingleGuyMoney said...

Dimples - Like Tupac said, "Keep ya head up". I totally understand what you are going through. I had to help my family out alot in the past also. I've had to stop helping out as much as I used to because I found out people were depending on me a little too much.
I also made the mistake of giving a close family member access to one of my credit cards. It was supposed to be for emergencies only as she lived about 200 miles away. Apparently, shopping was an emergency.

D.C. 2 said...

I hear ya D, what are you without your family. But, it's like Suze Orman says. People first, then things then money. Your family is number 1, ace. I say help if you can

Rad said...

Family will get you every time girl. That was part of my "Down and out" post. Whenever something coems up, don't you feel like your the first one they call? Granted, you always want to take care of those you love and money is just money, but we work hard for it, must I be penalized for being responsible :)

aynekat said...

Hi, Ms. Thing,

I read your comment and I know the feeling, family comes first. As far as a little advice I am really not sure how some people take this but Food stamps and other cash assistance is there until they are ready to get on their feet, don't be fooled by those who abused the system and make it seem like it is just for those with a mountain of kids and the ones that too lazy to get a job, but that is just a suggestion. Also my friend told me about being a mystery shopper it's not much money but it does give you something, if you are interested email me.

Love ya!

SavingDiva said...

I'm sorry to hear about your family. I'm sure it is rough to be the one they look to for financial support. Keep trying to pay down your debts...Good luck

Dimples said...

Thanks everyone for your comments. Much appreciated. Family comes first. There are certain things that I will have to put my foot down on but I will keep helping where I can with the necessities. My daughter counts on me and I need to make sure I am stable financially for her sake.

Single Ma said...

Whoa! There's so much I could say to this, but I'll keep it short.

I know how you feel. But I've come to the conclusion that while family is important, so is my livelihood and being able to take care of my daughter. If needed, I help with "necessities" only.

Jon said...

I agree with SavingDiva 100%. Make your own debts the #1 money priority unless a real family emergency comes up. When you have less debt, those payments won't be eating your income as much and you'll be in a much better position to help your family.